Episodes

Content Note: This episode of How to Survive discusses inpatient rehab and a troubled teen residential program. Listener discretion advised for discussions of restrictive treatment environments and institutional harm involving minors. This week on How to Survive, Danielle and Kristine talk about inpatient rehab before Charlie Nelson Jacobs joins to discuss his experience surviving a highly problematic and abusive troubled teen residential program—and share some thoughts on the teen treatment ind...

Danielle, Kristine, and Garon talk about the Stranger Things finale. Plus, they are still talking about The Materialists. Who's ready for a live show in Sedona? Kristine tries to ruin football for Danielle and FAILS. AND then...Danielle and Kristine go to Ojai to prep for the first HTS Quiz Show (Friday, January 30 at 7 pm Pacific Time- join us!) and barely survive! 👉 Hit Follow — it helps the show and keeps you alive! 🎧 New episodes every week! 👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + b...

This week Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive the potentially dangerous world of ridesharing and Oliver Pardo returns to regale us with a few wild rideshare stories of his own. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info .

This week on How to Survive, Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive losing your ability to speak — laryngitis, vocal strain, and the singer's worst nightmare… growths. Then, Gary Mann joins to share his experience navigating Standards & Practices during his time on The Sarah Silverman Program, when a performer's voice was challenged in a very different way. 👉 Follow the show so you never miss a new comedy survival episode! 🎧 New episodes every week! 📰 Substack: https://podhowtosurvive.substa...

This week Matt Belknap sits in with Danielle and Kristine to learn how to survive not being prepared for life and Jordan Morris joins us to share his experience of not being ready for his time at Burning Man. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info .

This week on How to Survive, Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive white water rafting — bone chilling rapids, unexpected boulders, and most importantly the difference between a wetsuit and a drysuit. Then, Drea Clark joins to share her unforgettable tale near the St. Croix River, where her fun summer job as a young camp counselor suddenly became way more adult than she was expecting. 👉 Follow the show so you never miss a new comedy survival episode! 🎧 New episodes every week! 📰 Substack: h...

This week, Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive exposure to sulfuric acid — trust us, you don't want to mess around with this chemical. Then Jeremy Bent joins to share the unfortunate way he discovered he’s allergic to sulfa-based antibiotics. 👉 Follow the show so you never miss a new comedy survival episode! 🎧 New episodes every week! 📰 Substack: https://podhowtosurvive.substack.com/ 👉 Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/podcasthowtosurvive See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy a...

This week, Danielle and Kristine jump on Zoom to riff on the “joys” of Thanksgiving, holiday stress, family chaos, and unmet family expectations. With a little help from mental health master Brené Brown (in spirit!), they break down how to stay mindful — or at least avoid completely losing it — in the weeks ahead. 👉 Follow the show so you never miss a new comedy survival episode! 🎧 New episodes every week! 📰 Substack: https://podhowtosurvive.substack.com/ 👉 Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/pod...

This week, Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive a bad psychedelic trip — visions, paranoia, melting faces, and all. Then, Ilana Cohn-Sullivan joins to share her unforgettable ayahuasca experience, complete with continuous vomiting, cheetah cosplay, and the moment things tipped from “transformational” to “terrifying.” 👉 Follow the show so you never miss a new comedy survival episode! 🎧 New episodes every week! 📰 Substack: https://podhowtosurvive.substack.com/ 👉 Patreon: https://www.patreon....

This week Danielle, Kristine, and Garon gather via zoom to catch up on the past couple of weeks in our lives. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info .

This week on How to Survive , Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive traveling to space — zero gravity, cosmic rays, and all! Writer/Professional Dancer Dennis Hensley joins the fun to share his hilarious story about auditioning to be a backup dancer for Madonna 🎧 New episodes every week! 👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content. 📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at h...

This week, How to Survive tackles identity theft and didgeridoo drama! Comedian Murray Valeriano returns with a hilarious tale of trying to reclaim his cousin’s missing didgeridoos from a Hollywood Hills art dealer. 🎧 New episodes every week! 👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content. 📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info .

This week, on How to Survive, Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive urban legends — from Cropsey to Candyman — and comedian Kevin Avery joins to share his own real-life medical scare involving a benign tumor . It’s a mix of monsters, medicine, and mayhem — only on How to Survive ! 🎧 New episodes every week! 👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content. 📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and Californi...

This week on How to Survive, Danielle and Kristine tackle Burning Mouth Syndrome (yep, it’s real!) and welcome comedian Dan Cronin , who survived his own burning experience in New York City—one that nearly took out his apartment. Get more chaos and laughter on Patreon! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info .

Salmonella strikes again! On this week's episode of How to Survive, returning guest Mike Henry shares his unforgettable encounter with the bacteria. 🎧 New episodes every week! 👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content. 📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info .

This week on How to Survive, Danielle and Kristine tackle runaway grooms (and brides!) and get the inside scoop on international “I dos” with Las Tres Sisters Marta Mendez-Cross, who shares her wild wedding adventures in Costa Rica 🎧 New episodes every week! 👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content. 📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sel...

This week, on How to Survive , Danielle & Kristine undress the topic of the strip search. We’re talking strip searches, survival tips, and the fine line between law enforcement and a lawsuit. Kathy Egan-Taylor of Bad Elizabeth shares her unforgettable experience with the UK Border Patrol. 🎧 New episodes every week! 👉 Support us on Patreon for extended episodes + bonus content. 📰 Join our Substack for extra comedy bits and survival tips. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and Califor...

This week on How to Survive with Danielle & Kristine , we face the spotlight: performance anxiety (something many comedians struggle with) and the fascinating world of cruise ship comedy 🚢. Actor and comedian Chris Witaske ( The Bear , Chicago Party Aunt ) joins us to share hilarious survival stories, from performing for an audience trapped at sea to being a magician's assistant. Plus, he shares a harrowing and mysterious cruise ship death. 🎧 New episodes every week! 👉 Support us on Patreon for ...

This week on How to Survive with Danielle & Kristine , we dive into two wild adventures: the beautiful (but venomous) Blue Dragon sea slugs 🐉🌊 and the thrill of skydiving! Writer Nikki Nash joins us to share hilarious stories from her book Collateral Stardust and what it really takes to survive falling from the sky. 🎧 Want more laughs? Get extended episodes, bonus content, and behind-the-scenes fun on Patreon . 📰 Stay in the loop! Join our Substack for extra comedy, more survival tips, and stuff...

This week Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive martial law (unthinkable!) and Cristina Fernandez joins us to share her experiences with Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info .

This week Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive Bears...again...but different this time and Emily Barth-Isler joins us to share a bear tale of her own! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info .

This week Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive your child's first day of pre-school and Oliver Pardo joins us to talk about his experiences at his first job! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info .

This week Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive a call with 911, courtesy of a listener, and Will Becton joins us to share a story about a dangerous situation he found himself in with some friends at camp. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info .

This week Danielle and Kristine learn how to survive dangerously low temperatures and Madison Shepard joins us to talk about a time she had a dangerous temp job! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info .